Furibundum

Day four of the kikes carpet bombing the fuck out of the towelheads, nearly 400 of them dead already. Minus the collateral damage, kids and others who just wished to live out a normal life. Ground incursion the next play, no end in sight and an all out war declared. That's what the chief Jew guy asserted today. Of course those terrorist Hamas folks started it up in the first place what with rocketing haphazardly into the Israeli territory as they seem prone to do, wiping out too their own fair share of innocents and guiltless citizenry, kids and others who just wished to live out a normal life. Cease fire be damned. That's what the chief Muslim guy butted in with the other day. It's open season again betwixt the two, just a matter of time it was bound to happen. No new tale to tell there, never will there be. Just one more heated up side dish on Obama's already full plate of less-than-savory leftovers to nosh on come next month, I'd reckon he should come to the tabl

Letter from my mom, no envelope to go along with but guessing around 1980 plus or minus a year or two. Whenever, here obviously proof of genetics accounting for my propensity for babbling from one gist to a totally off point another, clearly a maternal heritance. Dear Doug, Just a quick note so I can stick it in the box at the post office on the way to church. We're starting at 7 o'clock on Wednesday nights again. The ones that wanted it later haven't been coming anyway. Ha! Just to brief you in. Last Friday afternoon, I took Don to Independence Center to meet Mary, Denise and Dana. He went with them to get Jim and Keith at work (Keith helped Jim last week) then they all went to the Royals' double-header. And guess what I did! I spent the night with Eve. We had such a good time. Dwight and Heath had gone to Alabama, and Chad spent the night with a friend so it was just Eve, Tif and me. Saturday I made five pints of relish and two pies and a cobbler. That evening your da

I detest Walmart anyway, utterly reprehensible in my opinion for so many considerations. I refuse to shop there despite lowest prices every day and always, even for some of them thar mostest fantastic of sales. That's why I find such delight in stories such as this, one more item on my list of whys and wherefores my boycotting. From some Walmart Supercenter in Connecticut, a local guy there bought a buttload of $10 gift cards to pass out arbitrarily to the store's Christmas shoppers as they came in, his own spin on putting into practice random acts of kindness. Cool idea, until he was ordered by management to stop doing that after the employees noticed him handing over the cards to unwary strangers. Scary the concept of wanton holiday gifting apparently. Barry Goldberg said he had bought them, all $1,300 worth of the gift cards, to give away as a gesture of goodwill for handing out to customers in the store's lobby. “ I figured let me see if I can’t make a difference in peo

Britain’s Court of Appeal overturned a lower court's ruling already having decided that a certain guy, Stephen English, was not entitled to file a homophobic harassment charge against his former employer because he is in fact married, ipso facto totally straight. Now though he's good to go on legally pleading his beef, so to speak. The English guy filed his original complaint alleging homo harassment that began when his co-workers discovered he had been educated at a boarding school and also that he lived in Brighton, apparently like Frisco's sister city from across the pond. Who knew about the boarding school connection, but okay, apparently the both together screaming gayest of the gay. Anyway, somehow I find this amusing, both that this married lady-loving guy cared as much to be so offended and then quitting his job even over some name-calling and taking the matter before court in the first place. Also that when they obviously rebuffed his hoped for ruling, to go ahead

Right now it's about 4 degrees here, windy and the feel-like temp down already to minus 15, and it's only just after 10pm. Predicted to dip to around zero or below later on with wind chills down in the negative 25 degree ballpark. Tomorrow only if we're lucky up to about 8 degrees plus, but windier even so that during the day that we'll be having zero minus 35 degrees the chill factor in the afternoon. Finally then, tomorrow night colder still with negative actual temps and feeling like some number I can't count so low. Have I mentioned, this of all years so cold and I have no heat in my house? I swear to God, if not for Mom bringing out a couple of space heaters I'd be already stock-still hardened over from head to toe! Lifesavers those are, the space heaters. Not the really fancy shmancy kinds that actually could heat up an entire room, nothing like that. Rather the sort that you have to literally toe up to and hunker over until your kneecaps catch fire while

Yesterday I wrote a post, but did not publish it, about why even me being a gay guy and everything still not understanding all this huff about Obama's selecting anti-gay preacher Rick Warren for the inaugural beseeching of the Almighty for auspicious divine guidance on behalf of Barack from day one of his new job. I mean, I honestly do not dislike Rick Warren. His Purpose Driven Life book is the second all-time bestseller next to only the Holy Bible, and he does have some particularly excellent worthwhile perspectives about a lot of things in that. I might go so far as to say that not only do I not dislike him, I actually kind of do like him. I could explain why but that's not my point here. Then, however, while pecking away at the keyboard and remembering and listening again to his commentaries categorizing my own sexual orientation alongside that with the pedophiles and maybe those fucking their own sisters (or brothers, I suppose, whichever), everything just short of engagi

All righty, I said I am done here but this story pissed me off so much I couldn't just leave without venting. This whole thing has too much kindling getting my dander all fired up to not have to point it out. I don't think that really made much sense, but anyway. So last November here in the big city (that would be over a year ago in 2007) this local guy Wilfredo Pujols got drunk and drove. Hard to believe, I know, but yes some of us idiots still do that sort of thing despite all of the PSAs and stuff warning about how bad. Anyway, he accidentally while under the influence bashed into some other car en route to wherever he was headed and that car then ending up in his way, rammed it a second time knocking through a clear path though, like you do. Well then, that was certainly worthy of someone phoning in a report, so it wasn't too long thereafter that the cops were called upon and soon spotted his intoxicated and veering self later on, giving chase! The high-speed highway

I have become way too wordy lately, I realize that. Wordy, verbose, prolix, diffuse (thank you Sirs Merriam and Webster for those synonyms) ... basically I simply always am using way more words than necessary to pass along my random thoughts about whatever happens to be going on within my own warped head. And there I go again, see what I mean? I know, it's ridiculous! It has just become my latest bad and exceedingly annoying habit. I can't seem to keep it in check as is sadly business as usual for me. I blame it largely on my most recent addiction to the podcast thing, being long-winded does not lend itself over very well to the follow-up blog post. So here's the deal, I've conducted a personal intervention with me, myself and I, and have decided on shutting up completely for the time being, quitting everything cold turkey. It's for the best probably. Although I might need to break some fingers to manage staying away from the blogging, keeping them intact long enoug

See how over there in my scant blog author profile I did at least manage to add in the Carpe Diem thing despite my being too lazy for much of anything else? That's because it is my own particular catchphrase, pretty much sums it all up for me. Seize the day. Even though I often sometimes might need to be reminded myself, and that is why the incentive for and the meaning behind every single tattoo I currently have permanently inked onto my person ... always a constant affirmation in fact for me being here in the first place. The smell-the-roses-count-your-blessings-live-like-you-were-dying-the-past-is-past-today-is-the-first-day-of-the-rest-of-your-life-or-you-could-be-dead-tomorrow sort of hint to me personally kind of reminding. And for certain others, too, you know who you are. That was then, this is now, tomorrow may never come, blah blah blah, but like this song says best to simply live, laugh, love just for today. God, I'm getting sappy. I'll be bitchy again tomorrow t

Sorry to disappoint my fellow homos, some of which will no doubt be on board with this whole deal and probably even participating, and fabulous best wishes for them all. You go, boys and girls! But this "calling in gay day" for tomorrow is just flat out embarrassing to me personally. Exactly how is this making any point supporting the gay marriage thing, the impetus for this entire nationwide game plan? Ah, that's right, it doesn't really at all. It accomplishes nothing toward that end, of course, despite that being the original issue providing the instigators their Eureka! moment of deciding to rally together all workerbee Ls, Gs, Bs and Ts to validate just how reliant their companies are on them showing up in order to stay afloat... the " Day Without a Gay " scheduled for mañana I suppose is meant to make at least that much clear. But a stupid approach and bad idea overall just the same. Mostly meaningless, though, are the extraneous bits of the planned

This surveillance video from some highway in Santiago, Chile, shows what is apparently a not uncommon plight on that city's roadways. As a consequence of an over population of homeless dogs in that city, it's pretty much the norm seeing dogs as roadkill and often being run over. That is disturbing to me (I'm a dog person big time!) So it is upsetting watching this video of one very unlucky guy getting hit not just once at highway speed, but then tossed about and clearly surviving only to be run over again trying to get safe, finally winding up motionless in the middle of the freeway. That's very sad, but what makes this exceptional and a video well worth watching just the same is seeing then a canine buddy putting his own life at risk right thereafter, only in a final attempt at rescuing his pal, dodging traffic himself and then dragging his amigo across the way off to the side of the road. For the hit pup it was unfortunately too late, he didn't make it. Still I co

The most job losses last month seen than in the last 34 years. More folks receiving unemployment checks ever now since 26 years ago. Ten million unemployed, not including of course the seven million not really unemployed but working only part time from necessity so therefore ineligible for that tallying. Oh yeah, and the nearly three million who have just given up on even ever finding a job and not looking anymore (hand raised here) and those also whose unemployment benefits to tide them over have expired, too (other hand up) who don't count either. And still only just yesterday W. used the word "recession" for the first time. Really? Lame duck whatever, more like eight years of lame ass. Trillions in bailouts to the already rich guys, blank checks written with no accountability whatsoever to this or that corporation while some of the rest of us are sinking so far down we don't have a clue which way might even possibly be up and we still the ones expected to pay for t

Miley Cyrus, Jonas Brothers, John Legend, will.i.am, Beyonce, Pussycat Dolls, Taylor Swift, Rihanna, T.I., Rascal Flatts, Lady GaGa, Alicia Keys. Finally my aunt and my grandmother, shut up. Yeah, they all annoy me for one reason or another, sometimes for no reason I can put my finger on really, and there are so many more names but this handful of persons comes to mind straightaway. Maybe I'm just cranky, it is after all only about twenty degrees here with a wind chill around tenish or so right now and still early overnight, and having no heat, I'm feeling somewhat less than warm-hearted (or for that matter any other warm parts) right now. I guess this sampling of irritant persons is called up right off the bat because each has at some point over the past couple of days been in my face somewhere somehow grating on what I think to be my last good nerve. Then the next one comes along and finds yet another leftover raw nerve. (Why no politicians nor right-wing pundits made the lis

I hate when clicked pictures on blogs by default are set to link to the image source. I myself always dig down to tweak the HTML code so that the pics I upload here are non-clickable. If I wished to exhibit a collection of random images, I'd set up an album on flickr or some such. Personal pet peeve of mine, that irksome template coding. But hey, this time do feel free to go ahead and click the picture, though it bugs me that I still had to recode the thing to open up a new window (or tab depending on whatever one's browser settings.) You really must see this full-sized for reference purposes, my 1968 Kindergarten class yearbook picture page! Having faces to put with the inside scoop of what I recall about my fellow kindy gardeners ... I'm quite sure this will be most captivating for everyone. Just bored today is all, "breaking news" burnout here. Give me a break. Mrs. Keith - Always wore plaid it seemed, orange and brown variety. David Betzel - Grew up to beco

This most reverend Roman Catholic asshole priest guy in California, Joseph Illo, has highly recommended to his culpable parishioners that they most likely should pay a visit to the confessional for their souls' sakes if they happened to have voted for Barack Obama. The sooner the better, too, lest whichever transgressors might risk losing their "state of grace" if they do not opt for begging pardon before their next up wafer chomp and wine shot event. He even sent a letter to the sheeple explaining presumably on behalf of the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit, that voting for Obama was a mortal sin and how apparently one's eternal destiny could be in jeopardy. Obama supports abortion, you know, a mortal sin that. Again, another lamebrained bonehead tagging anyone supporting pro-choice rights the same-same as being pro-abortion. I'm sure he'll have some alarmed parishioners lining up before the next Communion, just playing it on the safe side. Idiots abound

What I'm thankful for today, mostly is that I found out that my Email just won me £12,733,500 in the Euro Million Lottery! I'd share my lucky numbers, but that should probably best be kept private. Anyway, all I have to do now to claim my fortune is contact Sir Willie Banks with a list of some personal information to verify my identity, that's understandable. I am so very thrilled and thankful that things are finally looking not just up, but way way up there, for me! But that's not all. Also, today, I learned that there are six (count 'em, six) girl hotties right here in Kansas City wanting to hook up with me! I am so in demand, I might consider just taking them all up on having a chance at the Dougmeister and let them catfight it out. I was also fortuitously pointed today where I can get the cheapest ever Viagra and Cialis which might come in handy with so much pending action. My friend Al Chandler directed me to that one, also with pointers on how to get a bigger

I have just spent the last couple of hours browsing through random pages and various entries out of the many hundreds from the journals I kept between 1976 and 1981, and all I have to say about that is ... " Sweet Fancy Moses! " Holy crap, confirmation that I have always been mentally oddball. Some of the babble I truly have no idea about, like who the hell is this BG person that I kept bringing up so often back in 1978? I have no recollection of whom that might have been. Reading also did, though, at times recall flashbacks of memories long since forgotten, so the perusing was kind of worthwhile just for the reminiscing. I think everyone should journal, although keeping in mind that when dead the memoir will inevitably be found by survivors, and some of which could seem a bit troubling from time to time. That's why I'm considering handing off this volume to my kid to glance over now, while I'm still breathing; a better time for explaining myself as need be rather

Police arrests of students in Hartford, Connecticut schools are on the upswing, particularly the kids of the colored varieties. Blacks, Hispanics ... mostly anyone not one of the white sort basically. Well, I couldn't care less their coloring and that's cool, if most malefactors are in fact largely of the darker-skinned mix. That would make sense, and shut up about it already. But it does seem a bit anomalous, really, all things considered. An ACLU report cites that these particular students, though, in both West and East Hartford districts are arrested in school at a rate far disproportionate to their numbers. " During the 2006-07 school year, for example, black and Hispanic students together accounted for 69 percent of East Hartford's student population, but experienced 85 percent of its school-based arrests ." Again, well, they are the majority there after all, and maybe do hold claim the lion's share of bad behavior so I have no problem accepting that sta

Gotta roll with the punches, bend when the wind blows, live and learn, crash and burn ... it's hit or miss, and that's the way it is. Jo Dee Messina - That's the Way

A college student, Abraham Biggs, committed suicide last Wednesday by taking a drug overdose in front of his live webcam while some of his viewers were cheering him on. It was even discussed about whether he might or might not be taking a big enough dose to get the job done. Others did try to talk him out of it, then some OMGs and OMFGs when it became clear it really was no joke after all. By the time the cops finally got there, also caught on cam, it was already too late. Twelve hours later when they arrived. Count 'em, twelve. He was 19 years old, attending Broward College in Florida. When the police arrived, he was already dead on his bed, the webcast still running live and people were still watching. Did I mention, twelve hours after his online manifesto of intent around 3 a.m.? His family is pissed that no one acted any sooner to save him, neither the viewers nor the site that hosted his webcast which had by the way also been notified of the happenings hours earlier by those n

This is me passed out at nineteen years of age back in 1982, pool stick still in hand awaiting my next shot. I appear dead, I know. Don't remember where from this grainy black and white I happened across here, I have an entire set of color prints from that night somewhere in a box, but in cleaning up my hard drive I found this. [ UPDATE : I figured out where from this splotchy photo after all, a FAX of a photocopy of a scan of the original that was sent to me a few years back, it's a fourth generation rendition so no wonder so bad. It bugged me not remembering. Found the original sent to me by one of the other delinquents there that night. Mystery solved .] Things I remember about that night. Just Denise, Barb, Del and me with the house all to ourselves. Lots of rum and Coke, then rum straight up when the pop ran out. In the basement, playing pool, I think there might have possibly been a joint in the mix as well. Not too long before I first got married, trying to squeeze in al

My life is an embarrassment right now, has been for the past couple of years. Downward spiral. Ups and downs always of course, that's simply life, but never spiraled so low ever! So, yeah, particularly at my age and from where I am right now turning the page over to a new year basically just sucked for me. Even though I knew it to be only another next day, it kind of was biting the big one. I just keep it inside mostly, mainly because I've lost virtually all of those who used to be amongst my throng of friends for some reason or another, so there's actually no one to whine to anyway. Either because I came out gay years ago and then was duly shunned by more lifelong friends than I'd ever have imagined, or because I once being the bestest of friends when I had tons of money to blow and always the one buying up the rounds at the bar or paying for everyone's dinner, when the Bank of Doug dried up I quickly found out the fair weather parasites. My social circle has prett

His Eminence James Francis Cardinal Stafford, some typical archetypal pointy hatted really old Catholic dude in a dress, last Thursday commented that by electing Barack Obama as our next president, America has " suffered a cultural earthquake ." That can't bode well, and Lord knows this bulletin from a man of God, probably actually channeling the Almighty even. I think those hats that are all the rage in the upper echelons of the Church work somehow as spiritual antennae, supposed to stream Jesus or something, but that's just my own speculation. By whatever means divinely inspired, he did pass along the straight dope about how Obama is so " aggressive, disruptive and apocalyptic ." Holy shit. That seems a bit extreme, don't you think? Particularly given that all those three adjectives I would think mostly might be more so applicable to the outgoing (praise the Lord for that, anyway) Daffy Lame W. Duck. Aggressive, disruptive, and apocalyptic? Yeah, I th

I heard this song played today for the first time in a coon's age. Always a special one on my reminiscing playlist, it's what happened to be playing on the radio when I smoked my first ever joint. Memories. I was in the back seat, my friend Martha and her then boyfriend of the day were up front. He liked the ganja and I was only a teenager, and we sometimes tend to try out new stuff around that time, you know. So anyway, we were on our way to my other friend Cheryl's high school's production of Fiddler on the Roof . I remember nothing about the show, other than that I found it extraordinarily funny until I couldn't hold back and we were eventually tossed out because of my laughing out loud. Good times. The plus side is we then could swing by the 7-11 and stock up on some much-needed munchies. I've always been a mess, still am carrying on though. The boyfriend's name was also Doug, and he drove an AMC Hornet. Don't even know why I remember that. Tomorrow

I always have an opinion. It's just that on some issues I have so many thoughts rattling around in my head all at the same time that I'm unable to coherently spew. Such it is with the Cali Prop 8 thing that has been going on for the past week and then some. Honestly, I won't even try. What I will say is that I am proud of my fellow queer community alongside more breeders than I would have expected, rallying across the entire nation protesting its passing, and the crowd that showed up here just about four miles down the road from me at the Plaza yesterday following suit. What I'm not so proud about is that, with all of the outrage of the past several days, really the ones in California where it might have made a difference, why didn't those folks get their gay asses out to vote? I read that only thirty percent of registered voters in San Francisco, of all places, even bothered to ballot on that Tuesday. Maybe a lesson learned that action might speak louder than words

Apparently, threats against the life of new president-elects generally spike after any election. But this year it seems that officials are seeing more threats against Barack Obama than ever before. The Secret Service wouldn't comment nor provide the number of occurrences they might be investigating. They did say, though, that since the election, law enforcement officials have seen more potentially threatening writings, Internet postings and other activity directed toward Obama than has been seen with anyone. So admitted anonymous officials aware of the goings on. Only on condition of anonymity, of course, because of security concerns. A couple of instances that I found particularly not so much disturbing as embarrassing, being a member still of the human race and an American to boot. In Maine, a reporter spotted a sign in a convenience store inviting customers to sign up for wagering on when Barack Obama might be assassinated, the "Osama Obama Shotgun Pool." The sign sol

This past July, I recall watching about this on the local news, the video of the broadcast posted below. It kind of pissed me off then, the red tape and bureaucracy for this family to have to deal with. Here's the story, this local teen Kerry Magaña just turned 15 earlier this year and she had been diagnosed with leukemia for the first time a couple of years ago, treated with chemo and radiation only to have it return a second time. Same same again, so this her third bout with the cancer, and not doing so well, was on schedule for a bone marrow transplant the following month in August. Her mother, single and twice widowed, works full time and has other kids so couldn't be at the hospital 24/7 and totally stressed out, I'm sure. Kerry points out in this video how she was worried about her mother. " I just look for ways to make it less stressful on her, and having my grandma here would be a big plus on that ," she said. But her grandmother lives in Honduras and even

It's Wednesday, hump day so it's all downhill from here on out. But just wait until next week, an entire week of humping in the Lone Star state! People will be walking funny probably by next Friday. Ed Young, this preacher from some mega house of God in Texas, Fellowship Church , is planning ahead to screw his wife every day for seven straight beginning this Sunday. The thrust, so to speak, being that this will somehow be reclaiming sex for married couples only, as the good Lord intended. And of course nothing like a week of scheduled monkey love to prove that case. "God says sex should be between a married man and a woman," Brother Young said. "I think it's one of the greatest things you can do for your kids because so goes the marriage, so goes the family." Fucking one of the greatest things you can do for your kids? Really? Cool, why not recommend kicking it up a notch and letting the kids watch even. He's also challenging his flock , the married

I am so anti-war it's not even funny. Even the Afghanistan debacle, and I know Obama intends to amp that one up but at least to maybe get it over with, too, sooner than later once we get our ass out of Iraq where it ought not ever have been in the first place. Personally, I think going into Afghanistan even for bin Laden was a mistake. I know, I know, war on terror, blah blah, and he's a bad guy and everything. Orchestrated killing three thousand give or take, innocent American lives. Well, we certainly have trumped that by oodles the wiping out of innocent civilians, huh? Not to mention the adding to our own U.S. of A. tally of the dead. Maybe I just don't understand collateral damage so much. But rather than destroying a country and every regional commoner being on constant alert to maybe be smattered at any moment, I just think there should be a better way. Maybe society is so fucked up there isn't any other option anymore, the world history of warring kind of proves

After my Election Day political orgasm I'll confess that right after, almost like a whack to the head, I started then wondering despite my Obama mania, how things might possibly play out looking forward. Lots of messes to deal with, after all. I have to say, though, that even so far being only President-Elect I am feeling so confident about this man to head up the country. And as an aside, can you point to anyone who has ever consistently presented himself with as much confidence without arrogance, and such invariable class and grace? Not that confidence, class or grace mean shit when taking over governing a nation gone to hell under the Bush administration, I know. But it certainly pumps up the hoping of better things to come. I have let go my doubting of what is in store for the future, though. I am convinced and a full-fledged believer now that however botched up things right now, we have someone coming into office next with the moxie to set things straight. America no longer a

Sorry, just one of those days, you know. Feel free to move along to happier browsing. It is a good song, though, and I know I can't be the only weirdo who sometimes wishes to just rather be dead. No? " Wish I was too dead to cry, my self-affliction fades. Stones to throw at my creator, masochist to which I cater . " You don't need to bother, I don't need to be. I'll keep slipping farther but once I hold on, I won't let go 'til it bleeds . " Wish I was too dead to care, if indeed I cared at all. Never had a voice to protest, so you fed me shit to digest . " I wish I had a reason, my flaws are open season. For this I gave up trying, one good turn deserves my dying . " You don't need to bother, I don't need to be. I'll keep slipping farther but once I hold on, I won't let go 'til it bleeds . " Wish I'd died instead of lived, a zombie hides my face. Shell forgotten with its memories, diaries left with cryptic ent