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Holy Snot Rag!

I just woke up about fifteen minutes ago from a nap. I know, it's midnight I should probably have just gone to bed, but whatever.

Anyway, thank God I did not! Because I awakened just in time (I'm thinking divine ordinance really) to this preacher man on television giving out his phone number for me to call in and order my free Prosperity Prayer Handkerchief ... that will make me rich!

Plus his website address, of course, so I had to check him out and guess what? He's an apostle! His mission apparently to spread free hankies to the poor. Green ones even. Because money's green.

I would never be so selfish as to keep this most excellent good news to myself so I'm sharing this with you all, my visitors. Get your free money hanky here, and you're very welcome!

Note that it is personally, apostolically blessed and anointed by the man himself. Note too that it does come with instructions, so not to worry about figuring out on your own how to apparently blow dollar bills out your nose. That probably takes some practice, I'd presume.
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Comments

  1. Doug BAugust 4, 2008 at 4:12 AM

    Do these "preachers" remind anyone else of Mr. Haney from Green Acres?

    ReplyDelete
  2. LuminaAugust 4, 2008 at 10:45 AM

    Well, I think I will just cut a square of some old green flannel jammies and blow...

    Years ago, MANY, so no laughing...like 30...I sent away for some free "oil" from one of these guys. Yeah, I was in need of a miracle and this oil was the answer.

    Well I did get the oil (wonder why it smelled a little like KFC...), no miracles BUT! I was now on the mailing list to receive constant offers of even BETTER miracle making gizmos...that were so spectacular that there would be a fee this time. What can I say...I was young and hopeful. :)

    ReplyDelete
  3. AnonymousAugust 4, 2008 at 4:30 PM

    Doug - Mr. Haney exactly! I love that show ...

    Lumina - I think it's just pathetic those who use these kinds of religious scams to prey on the gullible who really are desperate for whatever miracle. And like you mention, only to beef up their mailing lists to market all manner of holy knick knacks down the road.

    God must be so proud.

    ReplyDelete

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